.............. [entries|friends|calendar] Waiting for Letters Addressed to "Dr. & Mrs. ..." [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[14 Apr 2007|01:11am] "I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy." - J.D. Salinger Start Walking

[10 Mar 2007|04:01am] It's not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the ones most responsive to change. - Charles Darwin Start Walking

[09 Mar 2007|01:39pm] Just now, it hit me: Justin broke up with me, and dealing with that has really been hard, but each and every day, it hurts a little bit less, and I realized, I am just fine. Not only this, but I am going to be about a million times better in the future, and this is a thought that I can't help but smile over when I consider it. The part of me that wants to be unhappy, simply because I don't have Justin in my life, is the part of me I am going to focus on making happy through no one's efforts but my own. That's the best investment I could make in myself, because no matter how much of a whiney, wet-blanket bitch J.H. can be sometimes, I am stuck with her forever. Frankly, I am pleased with this truth, because those times when she's not at her best are more than made up for by the way she is otherwise. Not to go on and on about J.H. like some Jewish mother would about her son, "the doctor", but she's a pretty funny girl, she's got the capacity to do something phenomenal with her life that will change the world, and assuredly, she has a good heart that hopes to do nothing other than what is right. I don't know how anyone else in the world will treat her, but I'm not going to do anything other than love her, in a way that no one else ever could. 2 Walked| Start Walking

[26 Dec 2006|11:44pm] We should study; Judaism has always insisted that knowledge has the power, not only to make people smart, but to make them good. - Rabbi Harold Kushner Start Walking

[20 Dec 2006|04:29am] It is 4:25 a.m. I can't sleep. I just checked Onestart. My grades are in. W132 English: A- B356 Psychology of Motivation: A- M301 Perspectives of Disease, Healing, & Health: A Y374 International Organizations: A HAVA NAGILA. And, now, I may sleep. 2 Walked| Start Walking

[18 Dec 2006|01:51pm] Let's discuss my little sister, shall we? First of all, on Saturday night, I began dozing off sometime around 3:00 a.m., and I had a short dream, in which the following occurred: Someone spit in my Evian and pulled my earrings out of my ears with a magnet. I caught one of the earrings, and one fell on the floor, and I yelled at the person with the magnet, "You made me lose my fucking earring! Somebody's gonna step on it, now!" Then, I just stood there spinning around looking for the earring. Well, yesterday while I am in NP, Jordan comes home, and I find out she has stepped on an earring, punctured her heal, and needs to get a tetanus shot. What on EARTH? Second of all, prior to this announcement of Jordan's about the condition of her recently infected hoof, which did not happen until later, Jordan greeted me at the front door with her homemade Chex Mix (which was fabulous, by the way). I was on the telephone with Mallory at the time, and my dear Spiro had the opportunity to experience firsthand the child-like idiocy that is my younger sibling (don't get me wrong, the kid is a mensch, but she's also a complete putz). Anyhow, Jordan starts cooing like an infant (as per usual), shaking her Tupperware full of Chex Mix, and insisting I eat some. Meanwhile, I am trying not to be completely rude to Spiro, so I instruct Jordan to say hello. She then snatched the phone from my hand, held it ridiculously close to her mouth, and gurgled, "Hiiii, Maaaaalllory. I gots Shecks Miz!" before I could wrestle it away from her. [Apologies for that entire conversation, Spiro...hope your football-watching & Champps was fun!] Third of all, my miniature version of myself brought to the forefront her intention to be like me. In keeping with the tradition of myself & Mallory and our love of all that is tied to our greatest American President to ever serve, Jordan has decided she will join the order of facetious political namesakes, and alongside The Nixon Vixen (me) and Just Call Me Spiro (Mally), has dubbed herself Kissinger's Bitch. Fourth of all, I found myself bragging to someone the other evening about my sister, kvelling with nachas over the fact that when she is asked where she will attend college and what she will study, her standard reply is something along the lines of, "IUPUI, and I'm going to major in Political Science, like my sister." I would be flattered beyond belief if this actually happened, though somewhat sad, seeing as how she will never get to have G.V. as a professor. Anyhow, similarly, she was bursting at the seams to introduce me to her new computer game, Seterra, which deals with international countries and capitals, as well as their flags. Is this kid my genetic clone, or what? Fifth of all, I was wrapping Jordan's Christmas presents, and she barges in and asks if she can tell me what she got me for Christmas. I tell her no, so she asks if she can tell me just one of the gifts. Again, I tell her no, and she angrily throws a roll of curling ribbon at my temple. So, I had no choice but to grab the nearest tube of shiny foil wrapping paper and smack her across the face with it. My father, who goes to bed at eight o'clock (because he gets up at four-thirty a.m. to lift weights), was already snoring like a bison with a respiratory disease in the next room, so when Jordan started crying, I had to find a way to quiet her before she woke the beast, so I allowed her to reveal one of her gifts to me. She excitedly announced that she had purchased several pairs of underwear for me, all of which she felt compelled to describe. A pair with stripes, a pair with polka dots, a sheer, lacy pair, and a pair with "green piping and cute little green apples on them", which she further clarified by reassuring me that "they are just cute little apples, I mean, they don't have faces on them or anything." AHAHAHAHA. Ironically, right as she was unveiling her gift to me of holiday unmentionables that were, obviously, mentionable, I was taping down the wrapping paper on a box from me to her that held exactly the same contents. Not to suggest any sort of pun-like reference to my soon to be received fruit-applique lingerie, but Jordan Gayle is nothing short of the apple of my eye. Start Walking

[12 Dec 2006|12:36pm] Alright, fuck those Triaminic commercials with the little animated animals for being so damn cute, they make me want to rip my own face off. Start Walking

Indiana Born, Indiana Bred, Indiana Girl Until I'm Dead!!! [11 Dec 2006|04:56pm] I'd like to extend the following celebratory wish- HAPPY BIRTHDAY, INDIANA! Well, lookie there! Now the best state in the Union for 190 years! Every state has its flaws, of this I am sure; however, if you would like to bash the great state of Indiana, do not do so within earshot of this girl, unless you want a punch in the face to go with your verbal pummeling of what is clearly the greatest state for which one could realistically ask! As an American, take pride and revel in the blessings you've been given- love your country and love your state! Start Walking

[08 Dec 2006|06:41pm] Hahahaa...I love it- There is a definite connection between being funny and being Jewish. The toughest room I ever played was my mother's kitchen. - Richard Belzer Start Walking

[07 Dec 2006|04:14am] http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061206/ap_on_re_us/conservative_jews_gays Such is why I am a conservative Jew; however, I believe in allowing gays to serve in any religious role, without limiting them based on sexual preference. What can I say? I love God. I love gays. God would never keep His love from homosexuals, and practicing Jewish homosexuals would never keep their love from God. I could never advocate keeping homosexuals from anything simply because they are gay, especially celebrating & teaching about God. Why? Because I love God, I think He's pissed when people treat homosexuals badly just because they're gay, and I certainly would not want to be barred from anything or made to feel awful over nonsense like my own sexuality, or ethnicity, or religious affiliation. The majority of us do not keep kosher (I do, to the best of my ability), forgo doing work from Friday evening until Saturday sun-down, rigidly adhere to the policy of only considering fellow Jews as marriage partners (ie: the single name on my list belongs to a WASP from the Gentile-filled hive of Carmel), or force women to sleep outdoors when she's got her period, all of which we are instructed to do in Torah. Now, why don't we? Well, times change. This is why people eat cheeseburgers (ugggh, fucking sick, oh my gosh, lol), miss temple to stay late at the office on Friday if necessary, have weddings with a shiksa bride and a Hebrew groom (or in my case, Jadey Jew and her goy boy), and allow ladies to retain their spot in the boudoir, vaginal bleeding notwithstanding. As times change, we modify Torah to our liking to fit these changes, and thus, we progress. So, if we're willing to do this, does this mean we should ignore Torah entirely? No- not even close, as it bears an impermeable code of ethics, albeit, one that is surrounded with what I'm sure were some social and cultural "additions". However, by following it as best we can, even with our own adjustments, we should not be willing to pinpoint the parts we think should be most enforced, and ignore those we feel are least appealing to us. So, rather than overlooking certain mitzvahs that inconvenience us, we should look to those which were clearly given during a time that made them necessary, and modify those as well, and yes, this includes permitting gays to serve in Jewish congregations, as well as live their lives happily and without bad-natured interference. I am sure the Torah is much more strongly geared toward making certain we are loving and good toward each other than it is toward making certain gays are aware of the implications of Leviticus 18:22. For all of their existence, being oppressed, shown cruelty, and even killed for a quality that was (and is) not of their control, Jews, of all people, should know better than this. Start Walking

[03 Dec 2006|11:27pm] Haha, now we can all just kick back, and allow the jokes to continue rolling... http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061204/ap_on_el_pr/white_house2008 I do give a nod of approval to Evan Bayh, as well as a glance of "I told you so" to some of my liberal (and a few conservative) friends who have refused to acknowledge the high probability of that little Hoosier straight-shooter making a run for the White House. I suppose we will just have to wait and see! :) Oh, and PS: the idea of Barack Obama making a viable attempt of showing serious interest in a presidential nomination, not to mention, anyone thinking he'd actually get a bid from the Dems? Yeah, this results in the reality of me giggling. I mean, come on, it'd be like pulling your star arm in the final three minutes of a state championship football game to put in the freshman quarterback who's experience of being with the big dogs includes playing the last half of a single varsity game. Sorry, Obama- keep suiting up and building your legitimacy, and who knows? Maybe your day will come...like in 2016. 2 Walked| Start Walking

[03 Dec 2006|01:30pm] Oy vey... It is so cold in my city right now! Tomorrow, at 6:00 a.m., around the time that I will be waking, it is going to be 16 degrees, with a windchill of 6 degrees (of Kevin Bacon)! OY, THAT IS COLD! In other news (yes, I know, I usually start with announcements of the miscellaneous variety so that I can transition into all meteorological information with "here's Tom with the weather...", but this time, I took a different route: deal with it)... 1. I make delicious baked goods. Curtis and Zach, if you come over, you will be met by a sexy brunette bearing homemade chocolate cake with homemade chocolate icing (I would mention other names, here, but Curtis and Zach are the only 2 boys that I live close to me that I like well enough to offer the products of my culinary talents). 2. Mallory Brooks throws sweet parties....holla! ahaha My head is sort of pounding, and I have work to do and business to which I must tend, so, BYE. Start Walking

[21 Nov 2006|09:42am] Thanksgiving food is GROOOOOOOOOOOOSS! This is especially true if you are vegetarian or vegan, or at least it is in my case. If I had my way, the holiday would be altered entirely. Instead of celebrating greedy WASPs and the Native Americans who fed them, let's praise our neighbors to the south- THAT'S RIGHT, THE MEXICANS! Practically everyone knows that in my mind, the top three ethnic groups based on awesomeness, among other criteria = Jews, Romanians, and Mexicans, in that order. I am quite thankful for the Mexican culture, for being so damn friendly and festive, I am quite thankful for Mexico, for being so damn pretty and fun to visit, and I am quite thankful for Mexican food, which, (and Mallory will vouch for this) is the only variety of cuisine that I will eat an actually normal serving size of at a meal (as opposed to other types of food, where I will eat 2 bites and then refuse anything else for fear of 115 lbs on my frame becoming 215 lbs). THAT IS HOW AMAZINGLY GOOD MEXICAN FOOD IS TO ME. I WILL RISK GETTING FAT TO EAT TONS OF IT, OR SACRAFICE HOURS OF TIME & ENERGY EXERCISING PRIOR TO GOING TO EL RODEO TO BE ABLE TO STUFF MY FACE SANS GUILT! This brings me to my next point: Thanksgiving food, which is disgusting and smells like a high school cafeteria if you really consider it, should be replaced by authentic Mexican fare. My only argument against myself on this one is that I could end up getting fat from over-indulging, but otherwise, I am all for this. Additionally, I want Thanksgiving moved from American homes into Mexican restaurants. There are never enough festive decorations to satisfy me in the homes of my relatives, but my Mexican family knows how to impress when it comes to twinkle lights and other eye-catching paraphernalia. Plus, although they will probably have Christmas trees in their venue just like my Gramma does for the holidays, they will be a lot more likely to put a menorah on display at my insisting, whereas requesting the same from my Gramma would sooner result in her get drunk, telling me I wasn't really Jewish, warning that if I didn't stop claiming Hebrew status, I wasn't getting any holiday gifts from her this season, and reluctantly throwing matches at me to light my glorious candelabra after having her own true Jewish guilt set in and allowing me to place my menorah prominently in the front picture window. And so it shall be, for at least the next decade or so, that I endure the painfully WASPy tradition of giving thanks for a bunch of pale-faced pilgrims who condemned sex, decent looking clothes, and apparently, graciousness toward their host culture. However, my sister, God help her if she's not reading this and agreeing with me, and I will one day have the power as joint-matriarchs to revamp late November-January first celebratory practices, in which case, Thanksgiving will either be spent at a homeless shelter in the morning/early afternoon and then, El Rodeo (or the like) for the actual celebratory meal, OR, on the streets of Ixtapa, feeding the hungry, followed by going to CJ's (omgsh, Jordan, remember CJ's? TTAAAAAHHH), eating until we plotz, and taking to the beach. So, yes, I suppose for now, I have much to be thankful for, and certainly nothing more so than the fact that once Jordan and I put the holiday plan into motion, the highly likely refusal of our parents to participate means not having to subject myself to the anxiousness of my mother ("WHAT!? YOU LEFT THE CURLING ON BACK AT THE HOUSE?! OHHH, JADE! OHHH, NO!" *cries* "No, mom, not really, I was just kidding." *crying ceases, long-range glare from hell enters*) and the general obnoxiousness of my father (*marching, while wearing gym shorts, tennis shoes, and tube socks*- "COME ON!" ... "But, Daddy, I can't walk anymore, my suitcase is too heavy, and I need food"..."GET TOUGH, SIS, NO FOOD UNTIL AFTER THE CHECK-IN!"...(Jordan) "But, Daddy, I am really hungry, too! I'm getting dizzy!"..."GIRLS, CUT THE CRAP, GRAB YOUR BAGS, AND LET'S GO! I'M NOT PUTTING UP WITH THIS STUFF!") at the airport. During take-off, knowing full well that I will be indulging in chips & salsa in mere hours, not having to hear either of my parents kvetch in any way, and realizing my airborne status is just a round-about big "fuck you" to WASPs everywhere will make me the most grateful girl in the history of Thanksgiving. Start Walking

[20 Nov 2006|11:39pm] Gosh!!!!! Why are so many of these "pro-life" (and if you're not "pro-life", you're CLEARLY "pro-death"...wtf) individuals not blessed with good genes!? I mean, it seems to be such a terribly bitter irony: the people trying to have more humans being born are the most unattractive. EWW. Pro-lifers is this country are especially hilarious. They usually base their stance on "Christ". Well, since you folks have decided to be such an exclusive bunch, this little Jew girl will NEEEEEVER be joining you. Yes, that's right, take something that is already an extremely sensitive subject and tie into RELIGION! WAY TO GAIN POWER FOR YOUR CAUSE, GUYS!! Anyhow, the bottom line is, ugly pro-lifers must be stopped before they reproduce (or, convince other unattractive people to reproduce) and populate the planet with sub-par beings. Yeah, so my first step is to birth an army of about 10 super hot (duh) pro-choice kids, who I will take to Capitol Hill so they can watch those dumbfuck kids with the tape over their mouths that says, "LIFE", get a good laugh, and reinforce the idea that it's GREAT not to try to tell other people what to do!!!! Sweet, right? Oh, and if you're offended by this, you'd be making an obscenely huge mistake thinking that such concerns me. People can be pro-life or pro-choice without being dickfaces, but some of us opt out of that one. PS: DON'T BE A DOUCHE, WHAT WOULD JESUS DO? HE'D SAY GIVE THE JEW GIRL TOYS! GIVE THE JEW GIRL TOYS! Start Walking

[15 Nov 2006|02:30pm] <td background="http://bnimg2.beliefnet.com/ads/jwis_lborder.gif"></td> <td width="20" bgcolor="white"></td> <td valign="top" width="141" bgcolor="white">There is no true justice unless mercy is part of it. - The Zohar</td> BOOM. Start Walking

[13 Nov 2006|07:59am] Thinking of how I live my life every day as I do after reading something like this, I can't help but wonder for where I am bound when my time on Earth is finished. What is really so worth having for me, that I couldn't prevent a person from giving up their body parts in exchange for food? This is not me being self-loathing; I really am ashamed to know myself in this light. What is the justification for living as we do when others have no option but to live like this? http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061112/ap_on_he_me/pakistan_kidney_bazaar Start Walking

[09 Nov 2006|10:20pm] Good man: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061110/ap_on_el_se/rhode_island_senate Start Walking

[02 Nov 2006|10:07am] Ok, I don't think there is any better song to make me think of Justin than this one, and I have been singing this non-stop for the last week or so: Wake up every morning, I stumble out of bed Stretchin' and yawning, another day ahead It seems to last forever, and time goes slowly by Till babe and me's together, then it starts to fly 'Cause the moment that he's with me, time can take a flight The moment that he's with me, everything's alright Night time is the right time, we make love Then it's his and my time, we take off My baby takes the morning train, he works from nine till five and then He takes another home again to find me waitin' for him He takes me to a movie, or to a restaurant, to go Slow dancing, anything I want Only when he's with me, I catch light Only when he gives me, makes me feel alright My baby takes the morning train, he works from nine till five and then He takes another home again to find me waitin' for him All day I think of him, dreamin' of him constantly I'm crazy mad for him, and he's crazy mad for me When he steps off that train, I'm makin' a fool, a fight Work all day to earn his pay, so we can play all night My baby takes the morning train, he works from nine till five and then He takes another home again to find me waitin' for him He's always on that morning train He works so hard To find me waiting for him... Someday, I'll be a homemaker, and I will probably sing this song every motherfucking day waiting for his ass to get home. Mallory, you better be calling me during these times and keeping my intellect stimulated so I don't get lost in a life of laundry, linens, and lemon Pledge. Start Walking

Nixon & Semmelweis & Myself [31 Oct 2006|02:59am] My love of Nixon has only been further fueled by the class I am taking on medical perspectives; unexpectedly, for certain. Ignac Semmelweis was a Hungarian obstetrician, and he figured out that so many mothers were dying immediately after childbirth, because these doctors were sticking their filthy instruments and hands all over and inside these ladies (and yes, though many of you may be raising an eyebrow to that statement, I assure you, this anecdote will be leading to more commentary on Nixon, NOT Clinton...rimshot...). Anyhow, he was just rejected and disregarded and cast away, essentially, because he didn't know how to get his point across to anyone without being abrasive as fuck. Ring any bells? Ok, yes, I'm sure Nixon was your second example, with me obviously being the primary one. Still, I look at Nixon, and I know that the ultimate goal for him was doing what was best for the nation- I really do- no matter what the means to this end would be. With Semmelweis, it's the same situation: he was striving to end this tragedy of young women dying, and in doing so, created his own tragedy. Once he had figured out the means by which to eradicate childbirth fever, he simply went about applying it in the wrong manner; mind you, his own view of himself as never being good enough or accepted by anyone in the academic or medical communities surely played a role in this, but the problem arose when these internally contained feelings surfaced for all to observe. Again, look at Nixon- he had some moments of explosive emotional outbursts, stemming from his own deeply rooted insecurities and a surely, a self-fullfilling prophecy. Grant, I coulnd't help but think of you as I wrote this, as you so often question by admiration of Nixon, haha. Moreso, though, I couldn't help think of how bothered I am that I've latched onto Semmelweis, who had virtually nothing to do with politics, solely because he seemed Nixonian to me. Though it would seem my interest in politics is what fuels my attachment to Nixon, it's clear Nixon's politics, with which I stand mostly aligned, actually have nothing to do with my fascination of who he was, and his life, at least the parts made available to me; rather, it is just that- his life- along with his experiences, and his development of the character, and his motivations that bond me to his legacy, and now, perhaps, Semmelweis's. I have to wonder if the empathy I extend to these characters, which is evidently given on my behalf because I know myself to be sickeningly similar, is because I build my own self-fullfilling prophecy, deem it inevitable, and then use prominent historical examples as justification as to why I'm still way awesome, even if I'm a mess, or, do I use them as tools for learning? The question is: empathy, or sympathy? Perhaps, a bit of both; however, I understand that something went awry with both of them, and I have pity for them to a great degree, but I can't help but have a sense of unwarranted arrogance in knowing that should I ever accomplish anything of great magnitude, the last element to ruin it will be my lack of control over self, and the second to the last will be any shread of self-pitying, directed anger, or hubris. After all, I'd create my own tragedy to not look to those who had greatness, but have fallen, and use their courses of action as templates to be tweaked to near perfection for my own intentions. If you are feeling disconnected from what I've just stated to the point that you're questioning our friendship, acquaintanceship, and all those other ships, it's quite alright, because it wasn't meant for you, anyhow, though I'll still like you despite those facts; conversely, if you are feeling connected from what I've just stated, it's either because one, you are probably someone I'd consider worthy of conversation (meaning, we'd have an acquaintanceship), two, you are probably someone to whom the disclosure of my personal nature & attributes seems apropos (meaning, I supposed we'd be what are commonly referred to as "friends"), or three, you are probably all of the above, with the added factor of making me recognize how lucky I am to have someone who seriously does get it.*** ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ***Clearly, the last statement was indicating that your name would have to be Mallory. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jumbled am I about careers and pursuance of post-secondary education at the moment. Pour l'example... What career do I want? Within what career would I be able to obtain the highest caliber of success I am designed to obtain? Do I want to go to graduate school? If so, when? If so, for what will I go (I have several options, mind you)? If an affirmative decision is rendered regarding my attendance, at what educational institution shall I find myself? As far as careers go, I sort of want to be: 1. a professor (good times, I get to be in charge, and would give me plenty of time to be with my children instead of working constantly) 2. a politician (good times, I get to be in charge, and would give me plenty of time to be with my children, as I would use them for publicity stunts. Ahahaa, totally kidding. Or, am I? WTF, of course I am kidding, I'm not Melina Kennedy.) 3. a colleague of Gordon Vurusic's (it's possible either of the above two could realistically fullfill this option) 4. a writer (only about shit I like, though) 5. a lingustics expert (I made this title up, I don't really know if they exist, but in my world, this heading describes someone who is an expert. OF LINGUSTICS!) 6. Sheena Easton and/or Phoebe Cates 7. a hairdresser (for a period of time, I'd be so tremendously happy doing this) 8. Mrs. Justin Keller (trust me, I'd make a career out of this) 9. a clinical psychologist (my goal in life is to be nice to people and help them, and this would allow for that, while at the same time giving me the opportunity to dispense instructions based on my vast knowledge and whatever personal opinion I feel like throwing into the mix, and be elevated to the status of "more than a human" by my patients; oh, and I imagine a sweet office would come with this package, because I want insanely large picture windows and room decor of my choice while I redirect the cognitive behaviors and emotional travesties of suburbanites; additionally, I am really fucking skilled in this field, or so my GRE Psychology Test score would indicated.) 10. a pompous member of an elite academic community 11. an ambassador of sorts who goes to developing countries and hugs babies and children, and buys them anti-retroviral drugs, and feeds them chocolate cake and milkshakes and waffles, and sends them to schools, and gives their parents jobs, and builds them houses and takes down the Khartoum government (ok, the last part only applies to Sudan.) 1 Walked| Start Walking

[25 Oct 2006|02:15am] Four years ago today, October 25, I walked, with no particular purpose in mind of what I was going to do, into the Borders at River Crossing, unknowingly about to experience the most awkward of interfacings. Four years ago today, October 25, I walked, with no particular explanation for what had just happened, out of the Borders at River Crossing, unknowingly having just met the love of my life. Start Walking

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